Of maimed names and stunted spellings

I respect Vedic astrology and its various branches, off-shoots, cousins and incarnations, all of which, in my opinion, can be called an an empirical science, fine tuned over the millennia. They are firmly rooted in astronomical concepts, there is definitely a rigorous method to them and still the X-factor is duly acknowledged thus:

Phalaani grahachaarena soochayanthi maneeshinah

Ko vakthaa thaarathamyasya tham ekam vedhasam vinaa

 (Those who know Astrology can only indicate in a way what will take place in future. Who else, except the Creator Brahma, can say with certainty what will definitely happen?) 

That said, while I hold no malice against any of its practitioners or believers, numerology and nameology, of which I'm a bit wary in equal measure, seem to be a different ball game and are in a league of their own. Being the average person that I am, I like to hear nice things being said about what my future holds and get a little anxious if it paints a less than rosy picture. Playing positive mind games is fine, but don't bother me with having to change my name given to me by my parents. I can understand and tolerate the minimum level of subjectiveness that creeps in due to the phonetic conflicts between Sanskrit, which is the basis of nearly all Hindu names, and Tamil - two classical languages which both have their own set of unique sounds. 

Numerologists assure success if the name of a person, which is touted as the cornerstone for one's success, is made right. "The key to success is a person's name which when vibrating in harmony with their birth date will certainly bring success and will improve quality of life" claims a website. This is definitely a debatable claim and I'm not even getting into the definitions of "success" and "quality of life" here.

Names of most of the people that have made it big (successful in their definition) seem to have been spelled out correctly, I mean logically. It is not every day that you come across a Beel Gaatess, a Steev Jaabs, Stefenn Hawkiings or a Barrrack Opama. Or, by a twist of fate, have they all been named the right way; their monikers are, and I quote, "vibrating in harmony with their birth date"? 

To expect to measure the magnitude of "success" and the improvement in "quality of life" post a name change will more than likely be an exercise in futility. These things reside within the sphere of belief and the human mind would tend to attribute any good happening afterwards to the correction. And whether anyone would have succeeded anyways, with their names spelled the old way I mean, is a moot point. Be that as it may, some points are definitely vague and a few questions, besides 'What the hell?!' are worth popping:

• This is apparently a new fad of very recent vintage. I mean Jesus was not Jeessus, we haven't heard of a Rajhiendraa Chollaan or, more recently, a Nayhroo or Gandhiee or an Em. Gee. Arr - men that didn't do too bad in their respective fields, mind you. Assuming a constant "people-making-it-big" per capita down the ages, how do we explain this phenomenon taking significance only now?

• Is nameology relevant only to the written form? When your friend Rajan, now Raajhien, walks by across the street, how do you holler out to him? Besides, is there any work on going towards proper pronunciation of names that routinely get molested in the spoken form?

• Why is it that the Tamil speaking numerologists limit their work only to the English alphabets? Is it because that it is probably the only language that provides the phonetic luxury for such changes? I'm not complaining, but I don't see any changes being done to the Tamil spelling of the name that has just been given a make over in English? Further, what of the "ழ" (zh) situation in Tamil: names like Madhiyazhagan, Azhagesan, Thamizhvanan. For reasons that escape me, the english letters z and h have been the chosen appointees to represent the, well, "zh" sound that is unique to Tamil. How do such names change? Would it be Madhiyazagan? May be Madhiyalagan? Madhihandsome perhaps? It is a different story that these names eventually end up being butchered by modern speakers of the language. 

• Certain names of the Tamil diaspora have changed over the years due to various reasons. Coomaraswamy, Sarwan, Shivnarine, etc. Do we have a record of how all the Kumaraswamys, Saravanans and Sivanarayanans compare against their West Indian or South African counterparts?
  

I'm not sure if a person has ever walked into a nameologist's office only to be assured that his present (correct) name is just fine as is and needs no tweak; none whatsoever, and that the present problems that the person faces is because of something else? In my humble opinion, attaining success, assuming it is a destination to begin with, takes much more than using a date from a Christian calendar (Gregorian) system, applying it on an Indian name to mangle up its English spelling. I treat this system like the elements synthesized in the labs that exist for the briefest of moments but won't find a place in the periodic table and I continue to be ticked off by stunted and maimed names.