Wednesday, October 31, 2012

I love you son. But daddy would like to...


  1. Read a book without having to hide it from tiny, curious fingers trying to shred  for every turn of the page.
  2. Watch a (good) movie in one sitting without a diaper change/fight for control of the remote inbetween.
  3. Spend a couple of hours on a lazy afternoon at a Fry's/BestBuy store without running through aisles behind a (really fast) kid.
  4. Step out of the house without a plan, multiple bottles, tiny jackets, fresh diapers, change of clothes, the pram...
  5. Visit the local library without having to apologize to random patrons, hide from the staff or be heard at all. 
  6. Attend a conference call from home without blurting out the fragile nature of items around the house and hoping nobody noticed. 
  7. Discuss anything but poop details over dinner.
  8. Listen to a song with none of the following words in its lyrics: Wheels, bus, wool, sheep, twinkle, little, star, or the names MacDonald, Johnny or Jack. Unless it is Johnny Walker or Jack Daniels, that is. 
  9. Enjoy a cold beer without staving off tiny hands reaching for the bottle and insisting on having a swig of "juice". 
  10. Update the blog without having to wait until the little one has gone to bed. Which is at well past late every night.