Many of the Asian countries kick off campaigns to try and get their native population to speak better English. A noble endeavor, if you ask me. Forget greater objectives like helping globalization or smoother business processes. On a more immediate and selfish note, I'll be saved the hassle of having to deal with emails like this. We can one day, perhaps, even eliminate ads like "Incheon: A world best air hub." Maybe I'm getting a little ahead of myself.
As you ponder the possibilities, I would like to bring for your reading pleasure two signs that caught my eye on my recent visit to Taiwan. Without further delay, exhibit A.
Kiss and ride. Yes, you read that right. Kiss. And ride. There were multiple directional sign boards pointing to such an area in every high speed rail station. Polite inquiries revealed that it was the passenger drop off/pick up area: the dropped-off kiss the droppers-off and ride the train. Sometimes I wonder if the case for interesting sign boards is stronger than that of correct sign boards.
Side note: In my second visit to the country since the winter of '05, the biggest change is the high speed rail running along the west coast of the country. A train journey between Hsinchu in the north to Tainan in the south that took 180 minutes then now only takes 70. And the trains look and feel like the good ol' Shinkansen of Japan right down to the box-lunch laden carts pushed around by uniformed girls.
Exhibit B: "I want a cheese pizza." "I want my steak medium well done"
Don't find anything wrong with these sentences? Me neither. Except that these were posted on top of, umm, the urinal. That is right. A small glass frame holds these neatly printed sentences along with their Chinese translations. Three sentences per urinal. My immediate reaction was "But cheese pizza is bad for your health!". I'm kidding. The first thought was, and mind you, I'm all for spreading the knowledge of English: Why on top of the urinal? Do you really believe that the moments spent there while performing a very delicate task that demands your undivided attention should involve a certain level of parallel processing to acquire language skills?
"I want a cheese pizza and my steak well done please."
"Right away Sir. Have you wet your pants?"
If the rest room is where food oriented language lessons are to be indeed dispensed, I would hate to think what is on the doors of the toilet stalls. Selected sections from the Martha Stewart Living Cookbook?
"What made you become a chef?"
"Constipation."
Eww.
I'm stopping right now.
You're welcome.
