Monday, February 6, 2017

Lame-rick on TN politics

Now cooking in TN politics, a slow burning thriller
Long dead the leader, who was the state's pillar
Along came an amiable person,
That may stand the test of reason

Alas, it turns out, he may be only a filler.

Excuse this indulgence; I promise I won't do this often. 

You're welcome. 

Friday, February 3, 2017

RIP Nirmal Shekar

I'm shocked that Nirmal Shekar is no more. With his passing, a part of the sports experience has been blown out.

Blessed with the talents to bring a match back to life and etch it deeper in one's memory for the ages, Nirmal held court the day after the curtains came down on a grand slam event; his prose just as smooth as a Federer backhand and as moving as an Arantxa win.  

Grass - Federer
Clay - Nadal
Turf - Djokovic
Paper - Nirmal Shekar

Adios Nirmal. 

Sunday, January 22, 2017

Jallikkattu protests - My observations Part II

Yes, I have been surfing the news rather actively and here are some more observations in no particular order.

Short name Suppi Sir...

The protests are for ensuring respect to Tamil sentiments. But ironically, almost all of the protesters find themselves unable to frame a complete sentence in even reasonably good Tamil. Even allowing for camera nervousness and being in an emotionally agitated state, the health of spoken Tamil today in Tamilnadu needs some immediate care. And sadly this includes most of the press folks covering this. Tamil identity begins with speaking the language properly.

Saved by the bull

The Mannargudi mafia must be secretly thanking the stars for the relief that this protest has given them from the focus of the public and media. Gone are the pesky niece Deepa and the persistent advocate Krishnamoorthy from the limelight. But they also got one more validation of where Chinnamma stands in the public view: down in the gutters.

Vaai-la vasamba vechchu thekka

The tame rookies mutter the rather meek, less adventurous "jallicut". The grizzled veterans who have seen them all feel emboldened to attempt with Jallikkattoo, jallikkattuh, jallikatta. And the name of Alanganallur rolling off the Hindi tongues looks like a jallikkattu bull had viciously trampled it. Visu is a visionary who wrote "thamizhan thamizhana irukkanamtelungan telungana irukkanam"

India Today

In what can be called a tight slap across the face of PETA, India Today in its coverage of the jallikkattu protests ran a split screen ad of, get this, "Salman at 51 - being bad to being human." Yes, the black buck committed suicide.


Jallikkattu protests - My observations

Jallikkattu has traditionally been confined to the fringes of the collective conscience of the urban middle class. An annual event that happened in the rural areas while the urbanites watched TV while the calorie-rich pongal was digested. A distant, faraway phenomenon that was reduced to a few clips on the evening news. This could have continued to be so had it not been for the ban that brought jallikkattu into the living rooms of every household over the recent years.

Protection of native breeds. The PETA-jersey breed nexus. Benefits of A2 milk. There are many reasons - some less vague than the others - to ensure that the tradition of jallikkattu continues. But beyond the merits of these reasons, there is a more fundamental reason to protest: not allow someone sitting in Delhi to dictate how we should live our lives. People that aren't intimately familiar with the cultural and social mores of Tamilnadu should not meddle in our affairs.

A lady on Rajdeep Sardesai's TV show, appearing in her capacity as an "animal rights activist", declared that "jallikkat" has not been part of Tamil culture and that PETA wasn't calling for a ban on Pongal altogether. This mixture of ignorance and arrogance on the part of the North Indians - till recently quite liberal while using Madarasi - will leave the bristling Tamils feeling violated. It is not the right thing to say but Kashmir may not be the first state to leave the Indian union.

This started when sambhar became samburr, the dosai became dosaw and the vadai vadaw. Then the "ji" has started raising its ugly head as an honorific in Chennai today. But when rank outsiders start making rules on how we live our lives or cherry pick from our traditional practices ones deemed suitable for this day and age, we must say with all love and respect, "Abey, f*** off hain!"

My stand

Jallikkattu must happen. This year. And beyond. With regulations (enforced by authorities concerned) that shall put to rest any genuine concerns relating to the welfare of the bulls. I don't claim to be someone familiar with rural traditions and my stand is solely based upon the bits and pieces of information (of varying trustworthiness) that I have come across over the past few days.

North Indian media

The one favor North Indian media can do is to stop their coverage of this issue immediately. More than anything else to stop exposing their complete ignorance of all things Tamilnadu and the lack of their sensibility. Go cover the UP elections, Dangal box-office collections or Arvind Kejriwal's latest meltdown instead.

The BJP fiasco

There is a scene in the movie Pulp Fiction where Samuel Jackson is cleaning up the car after John Travolta shoots someone in the face. The BJP at the moment looks like Samuel Jackson doing "brain detail" after the Congress and DMK had caused this carnage in the first place. Between the lack of clear intent from Delhi and Subramanian Swamy's choice of words, the BJP has simply failed to seize the situation and control the narrative. They could have use this opportunity to gain a political foothold, however slender, but today stand cast as the villains instead. The AIADMK should perhaps sew C K Saraswathy's lips shut.

The Gounder-man rocks!

The quotient of nakkal-filled humor and biting satire packed into the slogans, memes and props leaves me with little doubt that a similar protest elsewhere in India would have been much less colorful. The mixture reference simply stole the show. It would be unethical to not pay our respects to Goundamani.

Chennai's Woodstock

There is something different about watching a movement grow and sustain itself without political or cinema support. I'm suspicious of anything involving the nadigar sangam and the usual suspects on the basis that if something sounds too good to be true, it probably is. That this group is so far free of cinema-kaarans lends it more credibility. A salute to the crowd for not doing the Northie-style candle light vigils.

When the lion(ess) is away...

...the mice come out and **** themselves. I first became aware of this expression in my first few months of entering the working world. As the protest continues on for a fourth day, I couldn't help but wonder if a protest of this scale would have happened had Jayalalitha been alive. Especially when I saw the occasional poster or two of LTTE Prabhakaran popping up.

Monday, January 2, 2017

A roundup of 2016 cricket

Hello and wishing you a happy new year 2017!

What better way to ring in a new year than to ramble about cricket from the year just gone by? Here are some notes about what I liked from the world of test cricket from the second half (or last quarter?) of 2016.

------------

As a cricket fan, the past few months have been embarrassingly rich. A veritable buffet of fine games, emerging heroes, exciting finishes and pleasant upsets. One couldn’t really ask for more; although waking up early (or staying up late) to take in the entertainment was certainly not easy.
As an Indian cricket fan, the India New Zealand series was a good appetizer. But the only lowlight of the series was the toss. The win toss-bat first-win formula did take away a bit of sheen off the 3-0 score line. Although I would say that the series itself was well contested, India was never found fighting to save a match. Cricket is the only game that throws up an “intense, nail-biting draw” and the lack of a fighting session where a team hangs on by their nails was a bit disappointing. And the unease that grips a fan that the pundits of the cricketing world will write this off as another dust bowl triumph even before, ahem, the dust had settled doesn’t help one bit.

The series that really set the tone was, of course, the 3-0 romp of South Africa against Australia. Any team that can compete on an equal footing against Australia – forget winning – in their own backyard deserves respects. But a visiting team tearing them Aussies a new one down under isn’t something that people of a certain age remember since the marauding buccaneers roamed the cricketing world. That the Springboks did this without the services of AB D and losing Dale Steyn dramatically midway through the first test sweetens the deal further. A victory at either MCG or the Gabba would have been nicer but I’ll take the 2-1 result as such. Take a bow guys.  And that Bavuma-Warner run out??

And when you thought that things couldn’t be any more acceptable came the 1-1 surprise in Bangladesh. The B’s producing limited over victories are no longer termed upsets. They are quietly shedding their “giant killers” tag, routinely snatching a victory here and giving a scare there. I’m not calling those a fluke but test cricket is certainly a sterner examination. A test victory cannot be achieved by merely lady luck flashing her smile at you – she better be wearing a toothy grin over many days. That B’desh managed to pull off a victory against a top tier test team right after a defeat is truly commendable. I was particularly impressed by Mehedi Hasan who proved to be a handful to the touring Englishmen.

The five tests against England set many things right for the Indian fan. First, some revenge (even if served cold) for the 3-1 drubbing in 2014. Second, I don’t know if Kohli had done something to upset them, but the Gods of the toss world finally decided to favor the visitors. So India winning the tests after losing multiple tosses took away that element of “what-if” from the equation (a.k.a one excuse less). In the end it was a great contest between bat and ball. So what if the bat was in Kohli’s hands and the cherry in Ashwin’s? The positives for India were many. The Kohli-Ashwin form, the lower order chipping in with runs, the Dravid-Kumble conduit to identify and blood the right talent from domestic circuit and the problem of excess be it openers (Vijay, Rahul, Parthiv, Gautham and err…Rohit Sharma) keepers (Saha, Parthiv) or spinners (Ashwin, Jadeja and Mishra – all three of them staking a deserved claim for all-rounder). I was super elated by Karun’s knock more for the sweep shots than the big score he piled up. Indian batsmen using their feet against spin is a common sight, less so the sweep shot. To see an Indian bat sweeping fluently was a sight to behold. On the same note, these are early days and sterner tests lie ahead. Good luck young man! The only two points of concern for India would be Ashwin’s ability to be among wickets abroad and our batting unit’s performance against the short/moving ball. I read somewhere that Kohli was considering a county stint ahead of a tour of the UK: professionalism flows forth from the captain! P.S: Kudos to the TNCA for getting the Chepauk stadium match ready after the fury of Varda.

The best fare, however, was reserved for the very last few days of the calendar. The first test between Australia and Pakistan in Brisbane will be recorded in history as having been won by Australia. But the drama that it provided, particularly on day five, was something that the people that watched it unfold will not forget any time soon. Call it the magic of test cricket or a virulent hatred for Aussie cricket, but I was robustly rooting for Pakistan for two full days. Ending up 40 short in a valiant chase of 490 on day five at the Gabba somehow summarizes Paksitan better than any length of prose or any set of statistics. And following up that performance (and cricketing world’s brownie points) with a good old collapse on day five of the Boxing day test? Pakistan’s brand of cricket has changed very little over the years. 

Tuesday, December 6, 2016

RIP Amma

Sad. I felt sad. There is still a ball of grief in the stomach. I welled up as it sunk in. And I hadn’t even voted for her. Ever.

I can now understand the emotions of the real supporters and followers. The outpouring of grief is genuine. A state stands bereaved and it shows.

Gutsy, stubborn and bold. Flawed, corrupt but bold. Easily the best choice for an administrator by a mile. A leader – in every sense of that word – that could strike an emotional chord with people in an age of elevated awareness, access to information and endless scrutiny. Mark my words: Karunanidhi's death, when it eventually happens, will be a mere foot note. 

The last of the charismatic leaders of Tamil Nadu is now no more, leaving a party and a state at the crossroads. 

I’m sad. RIP.

No riots, no disruptions, no mobs and no violence. Raw emotions, immense grief but peaceful all the same. #Tamil pride

Sunday, December 4, 2016

My thoughts on demonetization

Much like the Trump election, it was predicted that the sky would come falling down. But it has come to pass that the sun rose the next day and people went about their lives. The announcement by Prime Minister Narendra Modi to ban the 1000 and 500 rupee notes has left his political opponents frothing at their mouths, caused an exponential increase in the number of economic experts in the social media universe and has generally shaken up the system in a way not seen in the past.

Here is my attempt at making sense of the move as a non-economist and also to try and decode the reactions ranging from the frivolous to the baseless.  

First off, I write this sitting all the way across the globe having faced very minimal personal or direct impact by the decision. I didn’t have to stand in queues of any length to withdraw my money. And I have exactly one each of a thousand rupee note and a 500 rupee note - taxi fare on my next trip to India from my father – that shall now become nifty souvenirs. But of course I have been reading up on the announcement, its fall out and yes, my father has been in queues to withdraw money from the bank in India with the rest of the population.

One suspects that this announcement is rather the culmination of a sequence of planned initiatives than a knee jerk decision. The support to the aadhar card program, the jan dhan accounts and the voluntary disclosure scheme seem to support this. Yet when the announcement came, it did catch the nation by surprise. One has to admit that this government means business: there is not only intent but complementary actions to go along.

This move, bold as it may be, will not be able to bring back the black money – in other currencies – stashed away in faraway countries. Nor can it go after ill wealth stored in the form of gold, securities or real estate. And to state the obvious, this shall not rid the nation of all forms of corruption. In fact, I would go so far as to say that all the money in the mattresses may have been “converted” by some means or the other by now for say, a 20-30% commission. Indians are nothing if we aren’t crafty. Corruption will continue at the same rate/speed as before in new currency notes. And a less-cash society remains far away as a reality.

But, all things considered, I don’t think this was ever touted as a cure-all magic pill nor are we watching a Shankar movie here. When one sees it for what it is, demonetization is a first step in the right direction to go after the massive, parallel cash economy. The message is loud and clear: it will not be business as usual anymore. A system reset is perhaps not a bad idea and the prime minister has provided just that. The attempt to bring more sections of the population into the banking fold – an inevitable outcome - is an ambitious step to bring more accountability and even safety to the proceedings. E-rural banking could be the next big thing after bijli, sadak and paani. Improved tax compliance is perhaps another benefit we can expect once the dust settles. And if there is a certain measure of deterrence (conspicuously absent thus far) introduced, I would call it a small victory. There must now be at least a modicum of uncertainty in the minds of the corrupt who will have to be more cautious henceforth.

I shall readily admit that I’m not an economist and hence I won’t try to sound intelligent about the short/long term impacts of demonetization on the economy or its individual segments. Instead, I would like to put down my thoughts on the reactions to the initiative here in the blog.

Hardship to the common man. This seems to be the most popular political response with a few leaders (“The usual suspects”) espousing the cause of the common man with a new zeal rarely seen in the recent past. I didn’t get to talk to the average person on the street caught in the throes of the announcement. But catching up on snippets of media reports gives me the feeling that perhaps there is more acceptance (even if reluctant) than vehement opposition amongst the people. The netas, without fail, continue to under estimate the intelligence of the population. After all, old habits die hard.

Narendra Modi tipped off is friends. Though clichéd, any politician worth his salt will have to indulge in slander. Politics corrupts. The question is how much rather than if. And Prime Minister Narendra Modi is no exception. There have been whispers, insinuations and innuendos galore of Modi tipping off his inner circle. And I’m sure the accusers have evidence strong enough to stand in a court of law and bring an errant PM to justice. In fact, I wish someone does a Subramanian Swamy on the present government and brings to light this alleged tip-off scam. But the gut feeling is that these are mere desperate accusations aimed at gaining non-existent political mileage. Not only are any of the accusers clean themselves but neither do they have the stomach for a legal battle. In the end, a lot of hollow words thrown around.

Organized loot. When the silent one spoke, people would actually listen. But enough about the nineties. When Dr. Manmohan Singh denounced the demonetization drive in scathing words, I could only shake my head in pity. Having already fallen from grace, the noted economist has picked himself up, dusted and flung himself back down again. While he was the silent sentinel when the nation was being serial scammed by his cabinet colleagues, he has suddenly decided to become vocal. A ventriloquist’s puppet can be vocal but his words are rarely sensible and never his own. Although it is quite alright for the economist in him to be vocally critical about the move, he has offered very little constructive feedback or alternatives. It is sad that he chose to wear the ill-fitting politician’s hat instead of the economist’s. Loyalty to the Gandhi clan above everything else. And hey, in the long run we’re all dead, right?

The execution was bad. To quote Manmohan Singh, "monumental mismanagement". One has to agree that the way in which this was carried out could have been handled better. But demonetization, much like surgical strikes, can only be effective when carried out swiftly and silently. Given the nature and scale of this operation, a certain level of chaos could not have been avoided without compromising the secrecy of the plan itself. Planning ahead could have been a give away for the people in the know. Honest folks were troubled and subject to inconveniences and annoyances no doubt, but on the same token, people are aware that sometimes you cut a finger to save an arm. Besides gas, hospitals and train travel, the government could have allowed people to pay their insurance premiums, phone bills and some such other amenities to ease the situation.

The efficiency of this move to flush out the untaxed cash from the economy can be debatable and so also the execution. But merely questioning the intent, citing the flaws and taking refuge in the common man’s sufferings is predictably banal. The Prime Minister’s chair is full of thorns while the ex-Prime Minister’s is a bed of roses from which taking potshots is not terribly difficult. I have yet to see someone with the right credentials take the demonetization plan apart in a logical manner.


To borrow a popular phrase from the US presidential elections, “draining the black money swamp” is a process. And by all accounts, demonetization appears to be a good first move. At the risk of sounding too optimistic, perhaps there is more coming down the pipeline.

Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Thoughts on the presidential election 2016

I couldn't help but be reminded of "The Opposite" episode of The Seinfeld show this morning. For your reading pleasure, I submit the one dialog that perhaps captures the verdict most aptly from here.

Jerry: If every instinct you have is wrong, then the opposite would have to be right. 

P.S 1: I also urge you to read this post of mine from Nov 2012.

With that out of the way, here are some thoughts on the results of the Presidential election 2016 in no particular order.

People yearning for change and reposing their faith on a complete outsider to shake things up.
A shrewd businessman with zero political baggage and thus free of the handicaps associated with typical politicians.

And although the band of risk around this outsider (the "opposite") was wider, the dividends of a campaign strategy that struck a chord with that often neglected section of the demography - the majority - have just arrived. As they say, look who you called ugly in middle school.

People seeing through the smoke screen and giving a damning verdict on the credibility and trustworthiness of main stream media.

Globalization and world trade are great topics but what matters to most people is the ability to put food on the table everyday. Or at least the hope of being able to do that.

Immigration is a vastly different beast today that can create intense feelings everywhere.

Gender bias is still alive and kicking in the USA, of course. That been said, glass ceilings can (and must) be cracked with merit and performance alone. There are enough examples around the world, not counting the heiresses of political dynasties of South Asia. Another interesting comment that I saw on twitter: America is way more sexist than it is racist. One could ponder about that too.

Victoria: Who are you, George Costanza?
George: I'm the opposite of every guy you met.

It worked out well for George in that episode. The USA will wait and watch the new President.

P.S 2: I don't have a vote in the US. I have been following the campaigns only casually. I am not particularly fond of either candidate. 

Tuesday, October 4, 2016

Notes from a navaratri trip to Seoul

The hat trick
Three years in a row now, I have played Houdini around Navaratri time. Set up the golu, leave on a trip and return just in time for Vijayadasami (and dismantling); skipping the social aspect of the festival altogether. Oh, and leaving the wife to take care of inviting people over, entertaining and running the show. By herself.

The clash of the calendars
Around September and October is when the Hindu and Jewish calendars are brimming with festivals. Vinayaka chaturthi, Varalakshmi poojai, Navarathri, Vijayadasami on the one hand competing with Rosh Hashannah, Yom Kippur and Co. on the other. Festivals are good especially if you love food. But in the global world we live in, the latter have a stronger branding than the former that leaves guys like me traveling to meet upset customers during golu and whining away in a remote corner of the internet post facto. People, at least the ones I work with, are aware that Americans can’t be asked to travel around Thanksgiving, Chinese folks in February or Jewish people around RH. But sadly even the regulars at Indian lunch buffets don’t seem to be aware of our festivals of which there are many. The solution: I’m pitching Varalakshmi vratam cards, Pillayar chathurthi coconut chocolates and karva chauth dolls to Hallmark! In about a year, America won’t schedule business trips on avani avittam or even start a new project on a prathamai during rahu kalam. You’re welcome!

The ring
No, it is not the scary movie. I’m talking about the hottest accessory that I saw on everyone’s hand in Seoul. And it’s not even wedding season in Korea – although I could be wrong. The ring is attached to the back side of the cell phone and comes in handy for the very purpose these sophisticated phones are built: for taking selfies. Everyone and their mothers had one hanging off their phones. Run your finger through the hole and click away knowing that the phone ain’t falling down. In a way it makes sense that they are “coupled” to their phones by a ring since most of them seem to spend more time on the phone rather than with their BFs/GFs/spouses.

Navaratri at Incheon

So I missed out on homemade sundal. But on the way back, I satisfied my sundal craving in the lounge at Incheon airport. I was sniffing around for vegetarian stuff when a pretty girl of the lounge crew walked up to me and learning my predicament, asked whether I would like to have lentil salad. The dish had not yet been brought out from the kitchen when she handed me a bowl of channa, rajma and black-eyed beans salad and a bottle of tabasco! Kamsahamnida dee kondhe! (Non Koreans and non Tamils excuse!) If only she had started a rendition of a“gaja vadhana…” my Navaratri setting would have been picture (and sound) perfect. 

Open letter to the TSA agent at SFO international

At the outset, thank you for keeping our airports safe. Although the least likeable part of flying is clearing security, I fully realize the reasons behind the hassles. One must grin and bear the long lines and annoyances in the assurance that flying may not be fun but at least safe(r). A sad reflection of the times we live in.

With the politically correct statements out of the way, I do have a problem that I would like to highlight. It is how you insist that I place my shoes in the same tray as my laptop, the bag or the jacket.

On Sunday, at SFO, I placed my laptop, the bag and the contents of my pockets on one tray and my shoes on an adjacent one on the security scan conveyor belt. For no apparent reason, you walked up to me, picked up my shoes and deposited them right on top of my laptop. When I protested, your response was “No shoes in a tray.” I will not waste my time looking for meaning in that half-brained response. And to clarify, there were enough trays around that day for everyone to use separate ones for their left and right shoes. 

You left me with no option but to defy you and put them back in a separate tray: the way they were before you monkeyed with it. And when you tried to put them back on the same tray, I had to tell you firmly and loudly that I will not place my shoes on my laptop before you went away. Yes, words not fit to be reproduced here were muttered under the breath, dirty looks exchanged but I had to do what I felt was the right thing. I’ll put up with shit to ensure passenger safety but complying with some random security agent’s whims is where I shall draw the line.

You see, I come from a culture that places learning and the associated tools on a deservedly high pedestal. We have a god for learning, of course, and incidentally, the day to pay respects to that deity is just around the corner. And we leave our footwear outside before entering our homes. And if by accident we step on even a scrap piece of paper, we were taught to apologize for it. That's right. However, I don’t write this with an intention to preach about Hindu and Indian sensibilities concerning not mixing books and footwear.

The laptop is, among other things, an integral tool of my trade and placing my footwear on top of it goes beyond religious or cultural mores: it is downright unhygienic. Commonsense 101. But to quote my father, these are things that no school teaches. One’s got to pick them up on his own. It is not a crime to be from a culture where footwear inside the house or medicines in the toilet is acceptable. Perhaps you have better immunity for all I know. But the next time you see someone place their shoes in a separate tray, just leave them alone. Believe me, that does not endanger the safety of passengers or airplanes in any way.